It all started with a thought, sometime in 2013 - “here I am approaching the depressing age of 30 and, one day, I may become a dad. Not only will I need to ensure all efforts are put into raising this hypothetical child into a decent human being; but I will also need to ensure that my child, at the very least, has an awareness of the culture instilled in me by my parents.” It then dawned on me - even I don't understand why us Bengalis do things or think things the way we do. The key understanding that I was definitely lacking was an appreciation for why Bangladeshis born and raised in Bangladesh, but now residing in the UK, love Bangladesh so much!

I remember the perplexed stares I often displayed as a response to my bro-in-law's monologues: "to me, Bangladesh is the most beautiful, respectful, and friendliest country in the world." To which I would think: "he's lost a few screws on the way to the UK." You have to appreciate that my very first memory of Bangladesh was back in 1995, during the rainy season and shrouded by flashbacks of: massive heat, heat rash, cockroaches, and tummy rumbles! That's all I knew about Bangladesh at the time.

But, with the weight of the hypothetical responsibility of sharing my understanding of my ‘origins’ looming, mixed with my policy of: ‘don’t knock it till you’ve tried it’, I decided It was now or never to make a solo trip to travel and backpack around Bangladesh. I say solo trip because I knew that for this trip to be successful, I would need to see Bangladesh through a different lens - without the chaperone of family members. I also wanted to prove my bro-in-law wrong, so I wanted to explore Bangladesh, worts and all!

Once I had announced my decision to my family members - lo and behold, I came across much resistance, especially from my immediate family.

The resistance

Persuasion tactic 1

"Why do you want to go to Bangladesh? It's such a corrupt country, people are only out to profit from you. Go to India instead." All these years Maa would tell me how amazing Bangladesh is in immense detail, describing the amazing places I haven't seen and that she would like me to visit those places one day. But now that that ‘one day’ has finally arrived - she's putting in every effort to persuade me to change my plans. But if you know me well, you will know that once I’ve made a decision, despite how bad it may seem in your (even my) head - execute it I must! Plus, I had already been to India, straight after Uni and I was focused on my objective.

Persuasion tactic 2

"Ok - so what we'll do is your cousin will travel around with you and keep you safe." To which I reply: "then there is no point in me going - I want to experience it for myself and challenge myself, untethered, without a chaperone." Then enters my bro-in-law who, to my shock and horror, supports this view: "take someone with you - it's not safe to travel around yourself, people are not all what they seem." The very person that I would argue with on many occasions on the accuracy of his statements and views on Bangladesh. I was speechless.

But of course, nothing was stopping me. So then started the planning phase.